From the tops of the buildings to the streets below
From the Wall Street banks to the empty homes
Between the lines of the people standing all in a row
There’s a crack in the gutter where a flower grows
Reminding me that everything is possible
Yeah reminding me that nothing is impossible…
…Hey, hey, hey no matter how life is today
There’s just one thing that I’ve got to say
I won’t let another moment slip away…
…Don’t let nobody ever tell you that it couldn’t be done…
…Don’t let nobody ever tell you that it shouldn’t be sung
Don’t let nobody ever tell you you’re the only one….
-From Michael Franti and Spearhead, “Hey, Hey, Hey” (emphasis mine)
A few weeks ago I felt like I was on the dark side of the moon. Fortunately, the world keeps turning. Life is brightening considerably. The song quoted above has been playing often on our stereo. I need the reminder to push myself and strive for a great life. It’s too easy to fall into complacency.
I did go to meet that counselor and, surprise surprise, she’s wonderful. After a lifetime of poor counselors and a jaded attitude, it’s a huge relief to find someone who may actually be able to help sift through the compounded layers of sadness, anger, confusion, and uncertainty.
I’ve started studying for the GRE in preparation for the possibility of grad school. I’m trying not to let the 5-8% acceptance rates and lengthy applications intimidate me. I’ve been pleasantly surprised at how many people have been supportive. There have been a few naysayers, but most people have said, “Of course you can do this.”
Having an encouraging professor has been pivotal. It’s reassuring that my family believes in me, but it’s something else entirely to have someone who has a PhD to believe in my abilities.
I’m still taking fiddle lessons. There has been progress over the past year, but it has not been quick or easy. At least I now have a number of unfinished songs in my repertoire. Fiddle music brings me much joy so I continue on, even if progress is slow and laborious.
Our little vacation to the southwest gave P and I a break and a chance to reconnect. We needed that after a semester that was difficult for both of us.
I’ve spent a great deal of time during break working on this puzzle. It’s been comforting to slowly put the pieces together one at a time, moving forward one small step at a time. It’s given me a lot of quiet time to think about the past, the present, and the future. I hope and strive for a life that paints a lovely picture as the pieces fall into place.